An Art Work A Day

Today was finally the last day before the winter holiday week, and I could feel it. I started my day as usual now on Fridays together with the neck and back group training. I also considered doing a bit more at the gym after work but ended up deciding to build up for a proper workout tomorrow morning. My joints and especially my arm is bothering me quite a bit at the moment so I am doing a balancing act trying to work out as much as possible while at the same time not triggering bad pain too much. It is not possible now to know what I will be able to do tomorrow, but I do hope my body will allow me lots hehe.

Sometimes my fragility scares me. Today one of the elder boy students gave me a man hug just for fun, you know the kind where they pat your back. He was not hard handed but it really hurt and for quite a bit afterwards as well. My very tissue gives me pain so very easily and I desper. It is also in collision with my personality which is more at home on the bare mountains than in the greenhouse.

My journey will always be twosided, rehabbing what can be fixed or improved and trying to make the rest more bearable.

We're quite a bit ahead here in Norway timewise compared to the US so the Olympic Games cerimony started at 03.00 here. I slept while that happened but early in the mroning a repeat started. The choice was then whether to start my day watching physical activity or being active myself. Still too cold outside for a nice walk so the Gym was the only option this early.

Of course I went to the gym :-). Getting there with more than 3 hours to spare before they closed this Saturday I gave myself a challenge in honor of my daughter's 22nd Bday today; To give it all those 3 hours.

And I did!. I spent every pause between sets in one exercise either stretching or doing another exercise. After feeling let down by my body yesterday I also needed to recapture the feeling of me being in charge of my body and not the other way around. So well done me!

Afterwards I went for a short quiet walk outdoors to enjoy a wonderful sunny and blue sky weather which made it fairly warm in the sun although still very cold in the shade. If this weather continues my plan is for a very long walk tomorrow.

Wishing you all a great Olympic Games and workout weekend. :-)

Warning!!!! Complaining follows!!!

Went to the neck and back training group with physiotherapist this morning again. Tried to be more careful with my bad arm but still ended up with pain in both arms and shoulders. I felt that so many parts of my body would not work properly today and despered at the thought of how much work there is left for me before I work properly physically. So many parts have probably been used wrongly or almost not due to my chronic medical conditions and this training brings that fact up into the open. Normally one learns to do movements in a manner that avoids problems and pain, so many supportive muscles do need a lot of help before they will again work properly. SIGH. At the moment it feels like an endless job. Also my hands ache today so the weather forecast predicting more wet weather and snow this weekend is probably right.

I am very convinced that I need to continue these classes but at the moment I so do not look forward to triggering so many of my weak spots twice weekly. The very best part is the same as the worst part of these classes.

At the moment I feel totally sick and tired of fighting with my body and with pain, so I am taking a strong antiinflammatory pill and plan to go upstrairs to hide under the duvet for a couple of hours. Hopefully things will be brighter later tonight. To get better in the long run I will need to find the motivation to continue working on rehab as well as building strength also through the more painfilled periods.

[... end of complaining]

Things got better and I considered deleting the above. Then I thought, struggling is also part of the journey and editing out everything besides reports of challenges met with a happy smile from the first to the last minute is giving a false impression on how a journey like this really is. Reading this might give someone reading it later hope that they too can continue even when days like this is also part of the journey so I decided to let it stay.

Things got better partly due to the meds but also because I myself managed to mentally as well as physically do something contructive. Mentally I started thinking about psykomotoric theory which talks about how emotions can be "saved" within muscles - the body remembers and as stiff muscles are getting loosened up the emotions as well are released. When young I worked with aromatherapy and we often saw that the muscular relaxation had people in tears. To come to the point, while resting I concluded that it was possible that was one of the reasons I was so tearful earlier today. If that is the reason then me getting that emotional was a good thing because it meant that I got rid of a piece of sorrow today. Anyway, thinking that allows me to see some meaning and that is important for me when facing these challenges.

Secondly, I was very non environmental for once and spent much hot water in the shower and that combined with the meds has taken care of the brunt of the pain. :-). Also, probably a female thing, I did the big body pampering thing while there and that too is a way of lifting the spirit. It even gave me the confidence to do the horrible measurements. LOL.

Hopefully tomorrow will be a wonderful day healthwise

Today I started the twice weekly Back and Neck Training that is lead by a Physiotherapist. It was very good because it was kind of low intensity but still felt very intense because she made us do exercises that challenged our bodies with movements that we either normally don't do or have taught ourselves not to do to avoid pain. Several very simple exercises were quite difficult just for that reason. That made me very satisfied and determined to continue with it even though it is a bit challenging because it lasts a bit after my work starts. An understanding inspector and principal at my work makes it possible, at least for a time.

Well, I skipped the last part which was relaxation (somewhat similar to autogen training I think) and run from the gym hall to the classroom. In short it is hectic to make it possible, but I think it will be worth that and the costs.

After work and the after work meeting I went home but was not satisfied so in the end I drove down to the Gym tonight and spent 66 minutes on the treadmill hehe. For some strange reason I ended up with blisters UNDER my foot today. Very strange.